What Makes a Family?


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There are so many ways that my life can help answer that question — or muddy that water even further. . .

My Four Uncles & I on My Wedding Day
My Four Uncles & I on My Wedding Day

 My mother passed when I was only 17 years old. . . Is that a factor in my relationships at this point in my life? I viewed her as the “glue” of our family — when she passed away, our family gatherings all but HALTED. I will never forget that & the ill feeling it left. . . My wedding day, although kept as simple as possible, was a good opportunity to pull family together. . . I hope I can be that consistent “glue” for my family in the not-so-distant future. . .

I began meeting my father’s side of the family via Facebook just a few short years ago — many of them I have never actually met in person, but Facebook allows us to interact on SOME kind of level. . .

I have two sons that do not live with me. . . I love them both beyond measure, but it is not a relationship that society would deem “conventional” by ANY stretch of the imagination. . .

I have a couple of girlfriends that might as well be sisters instead of “just friends.” They are one of the few that AREN’T blood-related that still love me unconditionally (& I, them). . . They are my CHOSEN family & I dare anyone to challenge that. . .

The handsome husband & I are trying to get pregnant (not in a monitor-body-temperatures-&-take-hormones kind of way, but more in a let-God-decide-the-timing kind of way, but still). . . & while this is not a situation I would find myself in if I hadn’t always wanted to be a mother & if I didn’t want to be the mother of his child, it still poses so many questions, considering my situation — with my own “parents” & with my sons I already have. . .

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Perhaps I will elaborate on each of the above in the days & weeks to come. . . What really makes a family? I think the definition is a bit more loose than most realize. . .Reta Jayne

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Reta Jayne

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By Reta Jayne

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I am Reta Jayne. I help women learn to love themselves again (or more!) through no-bull discussions about mental health, self-care, & more. Click the email icon to subscribe to & communicate with me via email.

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You are a hiding place for me; you preserve me from trouble; you surround me with shouts of deliverance. Selah